“If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem.”
Do-Nothing, Nay-Saying, Energy Sucking,
Chronic Complaining Criticizers and Put-Downers
In case you are not aware, there is a war of words going on. For many the issue is what percent of adoptees will be served by various bills and how many will be thrown under the bus. For others it's a heated debate between legislative incremental baby steps or holding out waiting for purity.
The usual suspects are at it with their "deforming" name-calling!
My position regarding access is clear and unequivocal, and always has been. I am for TOTAL EQUAL ACCESS without any retrictions. Anything else is not equality. restrictions ofd any kind are insulting discrimination and infaticizing. I have LONG (since the 1980s) preached that the term "open records" confused the issue and needed to changed to equal access. Morerecently I have writtenabout not comvoluting the issue with access to medical records or "all files."
This post, is thus not about whether adoptees deserve total equality or not. I believe we ALL agree they do. It is rather about the do-nothing, naysayers...the chronic complainers ... the “energy suckers” who suck the wind right out of your sails.
These problem behavioral types think that it is their job to point out all the problems with the world, while it's your job to fix them. They seem to subscribe to the theory and make us all believers of the saying: "Those who can, do...and those do nothing, COMPLAIN and CRITICIZE!
“That’ll never work…!”
“What the hell are you thinking…?”
“That’s a terrible idea…!”
Chronic energy sucking nay-sayer complainers feel helpless or impotent and are successful only at one thing: attempting to destroy the results of and kill the enthusiasm and productivity of those about whom they are complaining.
These Do-Nothing BUT Complain and Citicizers do not seem to understand - or CARE - about the difference between constructive criticism that helps and that which merely denigrates.
Help? That's beneath them (or more likely something they are incapable of). They'll just stand by and watch others DO so they can complain afterward! Adoption reform has their fair share. Those who do not help write legislation or support efforts in any way but are right there to jump on a bill they deem "bad" or "unclean."
Criticism such as this, currenly viral in the wake of adoption access bills with restrictions, is a text book example of those out to belittle you, and the two types of people who generate such negativity: the “Never Was” and the “Once Was."
The "Never Was" according to this site are often those who are so pessimistic they give up without trying. The "Once Was" it says, "had their moment in the sun, and they have used that brief success to create an expert facade. Though they haven’t done much recently, they relive their glory days by providing unsolicited advice (criticism) about how things should be done. It should be done the way was it was done 10 years ago — that’s how."
Sound like people we all know?
How DARE those who have done nothing berate those who have? In my humble opinion,
unless you work WITH activists in states, you have no right to complain after the fact. PERIOD!
** I do not see BN introducing their own bills or assisting anyone with model legislation or any other educational materials.***
When was the last bill BN introduced? What was the result? Was there ever one other than the one individual BN member who put up the money to get it on an Oregon referendum?
Again - I am no fan of compromised legislation with restrictions. I HATE IT! It does not restore adoptee rights. It does not make them equal to non-adoptees. It misses the whole point that it even is a human rights issue...as the adoption reform movement has done since its inception (with the exception of ALMA's attempt).
And... I readily admit that I personally have done nothing legislatively except writing letters, a few protests, signing the Orgeon ad, and testifying once decades ago.
I thus do not feel I have any right to criticize those who do, and, as you have obviously guessed by now, I strongly resent those who think they do have that right. Once it's done, and a bill gets passed with restrictions...what's the purpose of all the name calling?
Bottom line for me: PUT UP OR SHUT UP! And, the final cliche:
Lead, Follow or get out of the gosh darn $%&*ing way!