Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Golden Cradle

She was 23 in a long term unmarried relationship and pregnant. 
They forced a closed adoption on us, we wanted open, and we decided on a adoption as I was in labor, not a day before that did this cross our minds, so we were NOT educated in any way shape or form. We didn't know we had a choice. 
An adoption lawyer told me that she and her colleagues always brings bagels or doughnuts to the nurses . . . .That is wrong. And it should have been a concern to the whole medical department, including my doctor, who knew how excited I was and etc about my son. I was very ready for him, yet a day or two before I said I wanted an adoption. I only got to meet with the agency for an hour and while I was medicated, then I did change my mind the day I was discharged but I still went through with the adoption because I was panicking and not sleeping, disoriented and very confused. And now, even though I am in my right to revoke it, they are coming up with a million and one reasons why they cannot return him. I know I will have my son back. I KNOW it. And I am sure after this, I will be helping out as many women as I can so I can prevent them from going through this.
This is the kind of stuff women get into when they get hormonal and are not properly educated and get scared. My son did NOT need to be placed for adoption. 
This did not happen in  the 1960s or the 70s or 80s.  It did not happen inn the 20th century.

It happened in APRIL, 2014 in the USA, not a third world country.  It happened in Gegisinger Wyoming Valley Hospital, in Wilkes Barre, Pa.
The agency, Golden Cradle, is located in [Cherry Hill] Nj, and they basically performed a Pa adoption except that the termination of parental rights was through Nj. The adoptive parents were an hour away from me. They didn't need an ICPC paper because [the baby] wasn't leaving the state, etc. The Nj paper just allowed me to have "irrevocable" parental rights. When I served them court paper for the release of my son, they panicked. Said he was in Nj with the parents I picked and was assured were in Pa, that I signed the 100a form, and it was Nj legal. But at court yesterday, they admitted the family and my son were in Pa, but that Nj had jurisdiction because their office is in Nj and I singed the ICPC contract and my termination of my rights. Basically, they did a Pa adoption and didn't think I would fight it, so they didn't do the correct paperwork. And when they noticed I would fight it, they panicked, forged a 100A paper, and now even filed for the adoption to be finalized in NJ 3 months after my son's birth. And from my understanding, also 3 months before they are allowed to, as in NJ they need 6 months of placement with the adoptive parents to finalize the adoption. 
under PA law, I have revoked the consent for adoption, several times already ( I am in my right to do so, since I am a resident of Pa, I gave birth in Pa, my son is still a resident of Pa with his adoptive parents, I signed in Pa and was Pa notarized, only thing I did was sign an Nj paper that said my parental rights would be terminated through Nj). 
The dad signed after me at the coercion of the agency, because I already singed away so it was basically "a done deal, and he didn't really want full custody of a newborn". Their words to him. He was just as hesitant as I was about this.
Why are predatory practices like this allowed? We do not allow funeral directors to solicit business to families of terminal patients in hospitals, why do we as a nation allow adoption agencies to prey on women in labor???
They HAVE committed fraud, and I am on my way to undoing it, but I know that having testimony against them will help in every way possible. Anything helps. 
I am of course going to have to go back again to court to fight this (already went yesterday for the first time), and it was even found that they have falsified my signature on an 100A paper for the ICPC (because they claimed my son was not in Pa, but at least they admitted that he was). 
You can help this mom and dad get their son back. 

If you have dealt with Golden Cradle or have any documentation of a pattern of coercive/deceptive adoption practices by Golden Cradle please contact me.

In a recent discussion of this case, while at linch with senator Diane Allen (D:NJ) after the bill signing, the senator's aid said some babies need to be signed away immediately in the hospital or they'd just be abandoned.  But this was not the case. Mothers can be discharged and babies can remain until decisions are made. Foster care can be provided until a mother can think with a clear head, and discuss option with her family and the bay's father and his family, perhaps, if appropriate. CARE of the baby is certainly necessary, but that does not neccesitate or justify pressuring a mother into a lifelong IRREVOCABLE permanent decision for herself, the child, and many other extended family that will be affected by the loss....in a moment of confusion! 

PROSPECTIVE ADOPTERS BEWARE!!!

You need to know about such predatory and coercive policies and avoid agencies that utilize them because if you engage in a slipshod adoption like this, you risk bonding with a child who may be returned to his or her rightful blood kin who want him and are capable of caring for him!

We have known about the sleazy, aggressive practices of Golden cradle since car part salesman Artie Elgart started it. I wrote about it in the Dark Side of Adoption in 1988.

This agency started out with billboards and fast food tray liner MARKETING campaigns. their goal was always clear: Finding babies to meet the demand of paying clients. they commonly housed expectant mothers with would-be adoptive parents. 

UPDATE:
A mother who relinquished through Golden Cradle in 1982 wrote in response to this blog post of her experience in an effort to help:
"Promised open.....never happened. Promised she would go to wealthy family that owned mansion and chain of restaurants....they lived in one berm apartment, were waitress and bartender...Drugged me up so much that I thought insects were crawling one me....Was bullied by attorney at hospital bedside and threatened with huge hospital bill....Called me a birth thing from day one and counseled me constantly in infertility, baby was never called mine...many things...
They said I could not take her home that she would have to go to foster care because contemplating adoption makes one unfit in the eyes of the law...I already had a child and they said that child would be taken from me too. He was twenty one months old..."
There is a long, clear PATTERN of coercive practices. 

Golden Cradle's Federal 990s up until recently said that they were non profit to "prevent cruelty to children".

Saturday, May 3, 2014

Adoption Activism History: The ORIGINAL ORIGINS

Before there was Origins in Australia or the UK, and LONG before Origins-USA .... back in the pre-Internet dark ages ...

In 1980, five women from New Jersey found one another and formed the original "ORIGINS: an organization for women who lost children to adoption."

We put out a national bi-monthly newsletter and held local in-person meetings for more than a decade.

We were pioneers! I was on the Mort Downey Jr. Show twice with adoptees and adoptive parents bringing light to the issue that was never even spoken about before. I was later on the Joan Rivers Show talking about the Joel Steinberg case, with Grace Smeigel.

The five founders of The Original ORIGINS were: MaryAnne Cohen, Allison Ward, Lucy Pare, Evelyn Ziemtez and myself. 

Mary Anne Cohen is the poet laureate of adoption reform.

Lucy Pare gained national infamy in a "sting:" set up by a TV news network to catch evil mothers trying to find and "stalk" their lost children by paying money to an "underground" searcher.  They sent a couple pretending to be birthparents to infiltrate one of our meetings! The news reports of her being "caught in the act" made her look like a dug dsealer exchanging money for information in a parking lot. But, when they made it known it was a sting and shone lights and cameras on a stunned Lucy, she stood her ground and compared her work to the underground railraod that helped slaves escape and let them know it was CIVIL DISOBEDIENCE to disobey laws that kept mothers and their children apart!


Left to right: MaryAnne Cohen, Sherry Chait, Mirah Riben, Washington DC, 1989. 
First national Match on Washington DC to unseal adoption records. 
We are holding our ORIGINS quilt made with patches for our lost children and our logo in the center.


This hearty group including Marilyn Bursen, Judy Taylor, Sharon Bell, and Joe Soll...
marched from NYC to Washington where they were joined by hundred of others of us.



This entire March and SpeakOut at the Washington Memorial was organized by Origins, the AAC and Council for Equal Rights in Adoption (CERA), without the Internet! We were a powerful and strong network of support group across the country! 






RussiaToday Apr 29, 2010 on Russian Adoption Freeze

Russi Today: America television Interview 4/16/10 Regarding the Return of Artyem, 7, to Russia alone

RT: Russia-America TV Interview 3/10

Korean Birthmothers Protest to End Adoption

Motherhood, Adoption, Surrender, & Loss

Who Am I?

Bitter Winds

Adoption and Truth Video

Adoption Truth

Birthparents Never Forget