Like most holidays, Mother's Day is problemmatic for me. My own mother died when I was not speaking to her--almost 40 years ago. It has taken me decades to make some sort of peace with that. And for 37 years, I had no idea where my only child was. I've known him for 5 years, but my baby will always be lost. This year I had some money, so I'm taking myself to Lauderdale-by-the-Sea. No family, no friends -- this holiday is all about ME. Yay!!! (And I don't know what this account stuff means. This is from Jamie Scott NY on Facebook.)
Mother's Day is one of the hardest days for me! I spend most of the day crying or trying to avoid it! It has NOT gotten any easier over the last 20 years!
Mother's day is just another day for me. My only child views his adoptive mother as his mother and, although we have a relationship, it does not include Mother's day or any other holiday.
I no longer mourn the loss of my son. I've reconciled my loss and I'm grateful for the relationship we have after 25 years apart.
My Daughter is cooking me breakfast, a very valuable gift of her time in a very busy year for her. Yes it's been difficult in the past,usually due to the attitudes of others.My mother knew for the last decade of her life what had happened to her baby and that she was a grandmother, it didn't take away her pain or unruin her life but it helped.
hi my name is jenny. i will be hidding under my covers for mothers day. children and youth services came and took my children on march 22,2010 and i still dont have my children back.so forall those mothers and fathers out there i know how u are feeling.god bless and good luck to everyone out there.
I'm going out to eat with my husband and son who lives with us. Any day I don't have to cook is a good day:-) I will probably hear from my other kids I raised. I understand why the son I surrendered ignores Mother's Day and that is ok with me. No big deal.
I want to send out a lot of love to all the mothers who are feeling a loss on Mother's Day. I also want to send out love to all those who miss and feel a loss about their own mothers tomorrow.
For me the difference is huge, pre reunion I found this day painful and confronting. A few times during reunion as well but this year I feel good about it. I know she posted me something and it makes me feel loved and happy.
Tomorrow I will be working and then if we are done early enough I might go and get myself a nice plant for my studio or some flowers. If not tomorrow then the next day I will buy myself something wonderful.
I know this day is not happy for everyone, I am not in contact with my own mother either. She never let us celebrate Mother's Day so I don't associate this day with her.
"I understand why the son I surrendered ignores Mother's Day and that is ok with me. No big deal."
I do not accept that my adult children cannot understand that this day is about me/us their mothers not about them.
One day a year you can do something out of your comfort rage and thank the woman who wiped your ass so many times...pick up a phone, send a card,. How f@*&g hard is it??
In fact I go a step further and wonder if it is not an act of passive aggression NOT to!
13 comments:
Like most holidays, Mother's Day is problemmatic for me. My own mother died when I was not speaking to her--almost 40 years ago. It has taken me decades to make some sort of peace with that. And for 37 years, I had no idea where my only child was. I've known him for 5 years, but my baby will always be lost. This year I had some money, so I'm taking myself to Lauderdale-by-the-Sea. No family, no friends -- this holiday is all about ME. Yay!!! (And I don't know what this account stuff means. This is from Jamie Scott NY on Facebook.)
Mother's Day is one of the hardest days for me! I spend most of the day crying or trying to avoid it! It has NOT gotten any easier over the last 20 years!
Good for you Jamie! You deserve it! Smart move!
Mother's day is just another day for me. My only child views his adoptive mother as his mother and, although we have a relationship, it does not include Mother's day or any other holiday.
I no longer mourn the loss of my son. I've reconciled my loss and I'm grateful for the relationship we have after 25 years apart.
Happy Mother's Day to all of us!
My Daughter is cooking me breakfast, a very valuable gift of her time in a very busy year for her.
Yes it's been difficult in the past,usually due to the attitudes of others.My mother knew for the last decade of her life what had happened to her baby and that she was a grandmother, it didn't take away her pain or unruin her life but it helped.
hi my name is jenny. i will be hidding under my covers for mothers day. children and youth services came and took my children on march 22,2010 and i still dont have my children back.so forall those mothers and fathers out there i know how u are feeling.god bless and good luck to everyone out there.
Jenny,
My heart goes out to you and to every mother and every child who are separated. I will add you to my special prayers this Mothers day.
Oh, I think I'll hide under the covers. I have a feeling this is going to be a tough one and I'm not in the mood to put on a happy face.
I hear ya! Rent a movie maybe... One NOT about mothers or motherhood.
I'm going out to eat with my husband and son who lives with us. Any day I don't have to cook is a good day:-) I will probably hear from my other kids I raised. I understand why the son I surrendered ignores Mother's Day and that is ok with me. No big deal.
I want to send out a lot of love to all the mothers who are feeling a loss on Mother's Day. I also want to send out love to all those who miss and feel a loss about their own mothers tomorrow.
For me the difference is huge, pre reunion I found this day painful and confronting. A few times during reunion as well but this year I feel good about it. I know she posted me something and it makes me feel loved and happy.
Tomorrow I will be working and then if we are done early enough I might go and get myself a nice plant for my studio or some flowers. If not tomorrow then the next day I will buy myself something wonderful.
I know this day is not happy for everyone, I am not in contact with my own mother either. She never let us celebrate Mother's Day so I don't associate this day with her.
Looks like it's going to be yet another Mother $^&ing Day for me!
I am not as accepting as anon who wrote:
"I understand why the son I surrendered ignores Mother's Day and that is ok with me. No big deal."
I do not accept that my adult children cannot understand that this day is about me/us their mothers not about them.
One day a year you can do something out of your comfort rage and thank the woman who wiped your ass so many times...pick up a phone, send a card,. How f@*&g hard is it??
In fact I go a step further and wonder if it is not an act of passive aggression NOT to!
Please see: http://familypreservation.blogspot.com/2010/05/getting-on-my-last-nerve-mothers-day.html
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