"Adoption is more than the legal joining of a minor child and an adoptive parent. Adoption is the creation of a family. As open adoptions become more commonplace in both domestic and international adoption situations, the definition of "family" has expanded, to include all three sides of the adoption triad. But what is the adoption triad and why should all three sides of the triad be respected?"
Actually, and more accurately, adoption is the destruction a family in crisis that
failed to receive the resources they needed to remain together and the creation of a muti-family unit that has two mothers and two fathers who share a child in common.
There is no "triad" because all of the power lies in the hands of the adopters. The child and his family are rendered powerless by age, marital and financial status. They are not equally legally represented in the adoption process and therefore it is not in any way an equal three way arrangement.
There is nothing new about any of this. It's been known for decades.
The traditional blood-kin family is composed of one mother, one
father, and their child or children. The adoptive family is composed of
two mothers, two fathers and a child common to them. Although society,
and to some extent adoptive parents, would like to pretend that it is
exactly like a traditional family, it is the differences that are
extremely significant in each member's life."
Dr. Herbert Wieder, a psychiatrist who has been studying the adoption
triangle for over twenty years testimony at Public Hearing before
Assembly Institutions, Health & Welfare on Assembly Bill No. 2051
(Adoption), 9 December, 1981, Trenton, NJ. shedding light on...The Dark
Side of Adoption, 1988, AdvocatePublications, p. 109