Saturday, August 21, 2010

Bragging About Paying Cash for a Child

On a blog about family economics, a couple demonstrate a total of sensitivity, instead bragging: We Paid Cash!

Their post was commented on with joy and happiness for their success!

I commented (twice) and got no message that my comment was being saved while it was reviewed, so no way to know if it will be accepted.

I pray you will post this comment:

This post - especially the title - is unintentionally ( I assume) offensive.

Adopted persons suffer from stigma. They are teased in school. Many express feeling rejected and as if they hatched, not born.

Speaking about paying for a child in cash exacerbates their feelings about themselves and fortifies the concept of adoption being a supply and demand business transaction and the child being a commodity.

I cannot encourage all of you, and especially David and Melissa to look at adoption not juts from the joy of acquiring the fulfillment of YOUR dreams, but from the perspective of a child and the family from which he or she was torn.

I urge you to develop a sensitivity and compassion for adopted separated kin and the losses they suffer and also I hope everyone can develop a awareness to the harm of speaking about how much their children - or obtaining them - cost.

I hope that David and Melissa will educate themselves by reading the writing of those who have been adopted, and perhaps meeting some adopted people to be able to know what it feels like.

I hope they, and all who adopt, learn as much as they can about their daughter's family of origins in order to be able to fill needs he will have emotionally and physically as she grown into an adult.

I hope they will be able to allow their daughter to grieve her loss and someday to reintegrate lost pieces of her self and her heritage without putting their own fears before their child's needs.

UPDATE: Comments are closed.

Comment policy:

"I moderate comments on my blog for one reason–to keep an upbeat and encouraging blog. Comments I deem to be rude or sharply critical, questioning another commentor’s ethics, or those which could... very easily spark a firestorm of debate on couponing ethics or which appear to be left solely for the purpose of advertising will very likely be deleted.

Yes, I know I sometimes upset or offend people by taking this hard stance on comments, however, there’s enough negativity and infighting in the world without this blog contributing to it, so I’ve decided to do something different and keep things positive here. I hope you’ll be kind enough to understand and accept this. If not, you are more than welcome to find another blog more suited to your tastes; I won’t be offended."

Here's the site's owner from WHOIS info:

Paine, Jesse

You can also let David and Melissa know directly how you feel about their article about how they paid cash for a baby:


Anonymous said...

Thank you. I was going to send this in yesterday but couldn't find how to reach you. Totally appalling.

Mirah Riben said...

and they don't seem to have a clue!

Submit comments at the link - even if they are not posted, hopefully they will be read!

Anonymous said...

I posted a zinger. I seriously doubt it will be published.

These people keep the baby pimps gleefully employed by handing over cold, hard cash and then brag about their "deal" and how they are happy customers.

Excuse me while I vomit...

KimKim said...

You can also let David and Melissa know directly how you feel about their article about how they paid cash for a baby:

Amanda said...

I hope the Money Saving Mom will pardon my rudeness of not wanting my minority group to be spoken of as a commodity to be "purchased" with "cash" as it conflicts of her policy on "couponing ethics."

RussiaToday Apr 29, 2010 on Russian Adoption Freeze

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RT: Russia-America TV Interview 3/10

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Motherhood, Adoption, Surrender, & Loss

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Bitter Winds

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Adoption Truth

Birthparents Never Forget