Just When You Thought it Couldn't Get Worse for Torry Hansen, according the latest ABC News report, Hasnen had turned to a second adoption agency to bring home a child from the Soviet Republic of Georgia, a source with the sheriff's department told ABC News.
She switched adoption agencies after the agency that arranged the adoption of her first child, World Association for Children and Parents, urged her to wait before adopting again, the source said. The association advised Hansen it would be best to settle in with the boy before adding to her family, the source said. ">the latest ABC News report: Torry Hansen had turned to a second adoption agency to bring home a child from the Soviet Republic of Georgia, a source with the sheriff's department told ABC News.
They report that she switched adoption agencies after the agency that arranged the adoption of her first child, World Association for Children and Parents, urged her to wait before adopting again, the source said. The association advised Hansen it would be best to settle in with the boy before adding to her family, the source said.
If this report is true, this woman seems seriously mentally defective (though not legally insane and still should be liable and put in jail)...or, she was trying to obtain a replacement kid so when she dumped kid number one no one would notice??
This case has brought up the RAD discussion front and center. Jean Mercer has a second thoughtful blog post on the subject also being discussed on Motherlode.
RAD is a "pesudo" (read: BULLSHIT) diagnosis created to ease the consciences of guilt-ridden inadequate mothers. Now there's a real syndrome for the DSM: Inadequate, Ill-prepared Mothering Syndrome. usually co-existing with Unreal Institutionalized Child Expectation Syndrome.
What RAD is, is quite simply: Ridiculous Attachment Diatribes; Radical Adoption Dogma.
RAD is more accurately defined as REALISTIC ADOPTION DISORDER: an inability to obtain, digest and believe truthful information because of a blind desire to become a mother despite all the glaring alarms and warning signs.
The only FAILURE is not of the child's ability to bond, bit of these mothers compassion and patience. And please don't flood my inbox with all your tragic stories of the horrors you dealt with for years before sending your kid off to a ranch or dumping your parenting problems on someone else. I am well aware.
I am also well aware that plenty of mothers deal with horror stories as a result of raising children born to them with incomprehensible physical and emotional challenges. Yet few of them dump their kids, and nONE have ever just put a seven-year-old on a plane alone to rid themselves of the expense and hardship of the responsibility they COMMITTED to! And if they did, they'd be appropriately tarred and feathered and NO ONE would come tot heir support as adoptive parents have come to the support of Torry Hansen with non-condoning understanding.
I have a friend who was a certified "health nut." Yoga, exercise, and eating only the purest organically grown vegetarian fare and home baked goods. She gave birth to a severely brain-damaged child who was "saved" by extreme medical measures and handed to her by doctors patting themselves on their backs for not letting the near-vegetive child die.
My friend changed her non verbal son's diapers for 30 years! And although she admitted to me that with each seizure she thought about not administering his life-saving medications and treatments, she diligently did so, her marriage eventually failed, her two subsequent children's lives suffered. But this was her child. She had not asked for these problems. She had not "signed up" for it, as so many adopters have commented about their great disappointment with the "damaged" children they find themselves with. In fact, she subsequently became strong proponent of home birth to disallow doctors playing God in this manner and interfering with an issue that nature should take care of naturally.
But she never gave up on her son... and I know adoptive parents who have done likewise.