Sunday, April 27, 2008

What Do WE Want people to Know About Adoption?

Since the good people who posted what "they" want people to know adoption are not open to comments from mothers or adoptees...

I decided we need to start our own list of things WE want to know about adoption and post on our website!

So...I invite you all to check the link and see what these aps have said, and then post your replies HERE!

Following are my comments (that "they" deleted):
  • We did not "chose" or “decide” to lose our children. Most of us,wish we would have gotten support to keep them.
  • Few were ever overtly coerced by adopters, but MANY are coerced every day by adoption agencies, facilitators and adoption practices that do not provide adequate option counseling, legal counsel, and allow adopters to enmesh themselves with a mother while she's pregnant till she feels an obligation to go through with the adoption, especially when they are with her in the delivery room and don't give a chance to really make an informed decision after the baby is a reality.
  • We want you guys to know that yes you missed morning sickness, and labor pains - be we miss their whole life!
  • We want you to know that we ARE their mothers! We are VERY REAL and our blood ties to our children is VERY NATURAL. There is nothing UNNATURAL about us our our connection to our children. Don't deny us that - you already have the prize!
  • PLEASE don't ever tell me that what I did was brave because I was a coward not to fight harder to keep my daughter. Don't tell me I was unselfish, or how grateful you are, or that I gave you a gift. It was not my intention at all for you to benefit from my grievous loss. I was not your surrogate!
  • Most of all "I" want to know why it is that people who do not get pregnant by accident, but who intentionally go through all the redtape to adopt sometimes terminate adoptions...give up on kids that are difficult..."return" kids who don't meet their expectations.0 Act as if they paid for a healthy child and are "not prepared' fr one that is not, as if you could have been guaranteed a healthy child if you were able to conceive and carry your own.
  • I want to know why some people who are so motivated and wanted a child so badly can abuse them and even kill them.
  • More than anything I want people to know that adoption should always be a last for children and that financial ability should not be the criterion for parenthood.
  • I want people to know that 80% of the children in orphanages worldwide are not orphans but have family who visit and hope to be reunited, as was the case with David Banda adopted by Madonna.
  • I want people to know that adoption should always be about finding homes for children who need them - and that there are more than 100,000 children in US foster care who could possibly benefit form a family while the US imports more kids through international adoption than any other nation.
  • I want people to know that adoption is not about filling anyone's need for a child, because that creates a demand that creates the worldwide corruption and trafficking in children in the name of adoption.

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