Friday, April 10, 2009

An Appeal for Mercy

Fifty-year-old, divorcee, superstar Madonna reportedly “broke down” and was an “emotional wreck”, though some reporters thought that her daughter Lourdes the rejection harder than the material Mom.

Not used to not getting her way or being told no, Madonna’s attorney who was shocked at the outcome, has already filed an appeal of the judge’s decision.

The Diva is reportedly “ready to do battle” saying: "I can't believe I'm leaving my beautiful baby behind. It's not right. I love that baby girl ... she needs to be with me."

This, as a man came forward claiming to be Mercy’s father determined that four-year-old Mercy will “be staying in Malawi” with him.

Security guard James Kambew, 24, lives in a remote village 100 miles from the orphanage. Some reports claim he was told Mercy had died in childbirth alongside her mother. Other reports claim he was told by his family and his in-laws to leave town because of getting Mercy’s mother pregnant when she was only 14.

Kambew wants to undergo a DNA test to prove he is the child's biological father. “I bear no grudge against Madonna. But I am Mercy's father and I want her to stay with me.”

It seems that Madonna, who relishes controversy in her real life as much as on stage, simply ignored and learned nothing from the negative publicity surrounding her adoption of David Banda, who also has a father in Malawi. It's called arrogance of privilege. Yet she fired back with indignation claiming it was not true that the laws were bent for her the first time around when the 18 month residency rule most certainly was.

The residency rule, which another judged waived in Madonna’s previous adoption, is important to protect against child traffickers.

She’s not just a material girl, she’s a downright spoiled immature brat who wants what she wants when she wants it and has hissy fits if she doesn’t get it. And after all, she can well afford anything she wants so why should she be deprived this sibling for David? Why should something like a blood bond stand in her way of taking what she wants? She’s only following in Angelina Jolie’s footsteps.

Jolie who adopted Cambodian born Maddox through convicted child trafficker Lauryn Galindo, reportedly said, “I will never give my little boy back. I’ve given him a home, I’ve given him love and he’s mine.” When she found out that he was not a orphan but was stolen form his mother.

Malawi must stay strong and committed to protecting the rights of its children and families. Her appeal must be denied just as she has denied to accept the appeals of experts and humanitarian organizations who work closely with African nations in these areas.

Madonna, please...if you have any charity whatsoever, please listen to the words of your own song, Papa Don't Preach. Think of what inspired those lyrics. Think f the pain of families torn apart by adoption loss and separation. You took David from his father, who he now doesn't even recognize. Haven't you destroyed enough lives?

If James Kambew, who was subjected to societies criticism, proves to truly be mercy's father, can you not see that these words apply to him:

Papa I know you're going to be upset
'Cause I was always your little girl
But you should know by now
I'm not a baby

You always taught me right from wrong
I need your help, daddy please be strong
I may be young at heart
But I know what I'm saying

The one you warned me all about
The one you said I could do without
We're in an awful mess, and I don't mean maybe - please


Papa don't preach, I'm in trouble deep
Papa don't preach, I've been losing sleep
But I made up my mind, I'm keeping my baby, oh
I'm gonna keep my baby, mmm...

He says that he's going to marry me
We can raise a little family
Maybe we'll be all right
It's a sacrifice

But my friends keep telling me to give it up
Saying I'm too young, I ought to live it up
What I need right now is some good advice, please


Daddy, daddy if you could only see
Just how good he's been treating me
You'd give us your blessing right now
'Cause we are in love, we are in love, so please


Papa don't preach, I'm in trouble deep
Papa don't preach, I've been losing sleep

Oh, I'm gonna keep my baby, ooh
Don't you stop loving me daddy
I know, I'm keeping my baby

Madonna is beyond being a stubborn brat. But I hope that the criticisms and issues raised by this very high profule adoption case serve to bring to light the many complex issues of adoption today - not the least of which is the money aspect. I hope if it does not ever reach Madonna's heart and brain it hits others and makes them think twice.


Jess said...

Ah, I wish the facts would come out once and for all. I have heard so many contradictory reports! I heard the uncles at one point felt the adoption should go through. Now there is a father who wants the child to stay with him--surely his rights trump everyone else's if they go through with DNA. The multiple reports are a challenge in a culture where info is passed on orally. Whatever happened or will happened, it was correct to refuse Madonna's petition and not to waive the 18-month residency requirement. I too am dismayed that she seems so blissfully unaware of where IA is right now. She could be a spokesperson; instead she's just entitled.

AdoptAuthor said...

Yes, an uncle of Mercy was convinced it was "best" to let his niece have all the material advantages Madonna could offer.

Likewise, David's father and other relatives, originally against adoption, were persuaded to let him go. They were persuaded, no doubt, by a community relying on Madonna to build a school and not wanting to offend her.

And, likewise so were all of us convinced that letting our children go was "best" for them!

Yes...entitlement...ethnocentricity...arrogance. It reeks of all of that! Conversely, some call it colonialism and cultural genocide.

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