Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Is Adoption The Solution?

Great Expectations for Young Mothers

by Mirah Riben

The Gloucester school teen pregnancy spike in teen pregnancy rates is the latest fodder for the media’s reporting of an increase in the number of teen pregnancies in both the U.S. and the U.K. The first such rise in more than a decade, it has been called ‘disturbing’ (1) that in 2006 the teen birth rate in America increased, for the first time in 15 years, according to a report by the National Center for Health Statistics (NCHS).

The “trend” has been blamed on Hollywood—both the personal lives of the stars like Britney Spears and her 16-year-old pregnant sister Jamie — as well as movies such a “Knocked Up”, “Waitress”, and “Juno.”

Worldwide, rates of teenage pregnancy range from 143 per 1000 in sub-Saharan Africa to 2.9 per 1000 in South Korea. After a decade of abstinence-only sex education, the US teen pregnancy rate is 53 per thousand, twice the rate of any other industrialized nation (WHO).

Are the concerns warranted?

According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), single mother births are surging among women ages 25 to 29 but teenagers account for only 23 percent of these births.

Looking at the larger picture, teen marriage and childbearing was the norm and still are in much of the world, from 13-year old Juliet Capulet to 15 year-old Pocahontas. “Most of us would find our family trees dotted with many teen marriages. Marital durability has more to do with the expectations and support of surrounding society than with the partners’ age.” (2)

David Popenoe, author and director of the National Marriage Project at Rutgers University seems to agree, reporting that “in the developed nations the situation is different. The networks to help the teen mothers, composed of grandmothers, large, extended families, intimate neighborhoods, and working fathers, are seldom in existence….Under modern conditions, teen pregnancies are considered not a blessing but a curse.” (3)

Is adoption a solution?

Rep. Larry Liston believing that a lessening in the stigma of pregnancy outside of marriage is part of the problem, was criticized for commenting: "In my parents' day and age, (single teen parents) were sent away, they were shunned, they were called what they are. There was at least a sense of shame. There's no sense of shame today. Society condones it. I think it's wrong. They're sluts. And I don't mean just the women. I mean the men too."

His comments drew heavy fire, leading to an apology. Yet, despite all of the hullabaloo, the American teenage pregnancy rate was actually at an all time high in the 1950s.

Pregnant teenagers face many of the same obstetric issues as women in their 20s and 30s. However, teens are known to be prone to poor nutrition, insufficient pre-natal care, premature births and low birth-weight babies. U.S. rates of premature births climbed steadily during the past two decades reaching an estimated 12.8 percent of births in 2006, government figures show. More than 540,000 babies were born premature that year.

Adoption—which can only occur after the birth—does not prevent or even reduce these risk factors. Conversely, delaying childbirth increases several risk factors for infertility. Fertility treatments that result in multiple births and older mothers contributed to the rise.

For mothers between 15 and 19, age in itself is not a risk factor, but additional risks may be associated with socioeconomic factors. Concern is raised that teen mothers will not finish school and will therefore be subjected to – and subject their children to – a life of poverty. However in a five-year longitudinal study that compared the lives of adolescent mothers, 116 of whom chose to parent and 76 of whom chose to place their first child for adoption the two groups differed little in educational attainment. No significant group differences were found in the psychological measures of well-being. Although relinquishers are more likely to be employed, their earnings at the five-year follow-up do not differ from those of partners. The authors conclude that the decision to parent or relinquish does not set the course for these young women's lives. (4)

Amidst all the concern over women having their children while they are young and fertile – “babies having babies” – there is little concern about women who wait too long and face infertility, take fertility drugs and have large families all at once in their 40s or 50s….a “trend” that might be considered at least equally as “disturbing” in terms of the health of the mother and the child as well as the cost to society, as premature high-risk births require millions of dollars in medical treatment at birth and special education for the school life of the child.

Young mothers are often told that they are being selfish and should allow others—more mature, married, and financially “stable”—to raise their child. The irony in this is that neither marriage status, nor finances are guaranteed to remain as they are – one of the realities shown in the film “Juno.” Are young mothers anymore selfish to want to have their families when they are younger and complete their education and career later in life, than those who chose the reverse, risking not be around to see their child graduate college?

Perhaps it’s time to reorder our priorities. The exact window for chronological perfection is 20-30. But as with weight few of us fall within the ideal. While no one would advocate fourteen year olds or younger parenting, neither is 40 or older optimal. Each has benefits and challenges. Single mothers by choice, of a more “appropriate” or acceptable age, are also struggling with finances, day care and many of the same issues as are younger moms. And, when they cannot succeed in becoming pregnant, they adopt – taking a child from another single mother.

The uncle of Jamie Lynn Spear’s baby’s father in an interview calmly recognized that it was not the best idea for her to be pregnant. But he said, “It’s also not the worst thing that could happen.” With support, the best can be made of an untimely situation. Fantasia Barrino, for example, went from single teen mother to winner of American Idol to Broadway in the starring role of Celie in The Color Purple.

Teen mothers report:

"It's hard, but it's worth it—that's what I think."

"If you have a baby, it’s not the end of the world, and you have to make the best decision for your kid. Don’t let it stop your dreams—just keep pursuing them." (5)

Conclusions

The role of family and society is to support all expectant mothers and mothers, not to judge who is “deserving” of the joys of motherhood and who is not based on arbitrary factors such as youth or finances. All mothers-to-be deserve to receive unbiased information the pros and cons in objective terms and assistance to go forward with their decision.

The Gloucester High School pact is an anomaly, and according to many psychologists has more to do with teens seeking peer support in defying social norms. According to Gracie Hsu of the Family Research Council, "contrary to the common perception that teenage sex and pregnancy typically stem from two teenagers getting caught up in the heat of the moment, new research reveals that many teenage girls are being sexually exploited and impregnated by adult men." That is a serious situation that needs to be addressed rather than shaming young victims.

Adoption is not a solution for teen pregnancy. According to Bernadette Wright, PhD and president of origins-USA, a national non profit that advocates for the rights pf mothers and keeping families together: “It merely exploits the situation to fill a demand for infants to adopt while creating lifelong grief, guilt and shame for mothers and feelings of abandonment and rejection for their children.”

The way to reduce teen pregnancies is to broaden and increase health and sex education from “abstinence-only” to including birth control methods.


Comment: http://digg.com/world_news/Great_Expectations_for_Young_Mothers

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

The ALL NEW Origins-USA!

Origins-USA has begun collecting the stories of mothers who lost children to adoption, to raise awareness of mothers' experiences and the effects of adoption separation on mothers. Please take a few minutes to share your story in your own words, at http://www.origins-usa.org/Default.aspx?pageId=141333.


We have also launched a new program called HUGS - "Helping "U" Get Support". Visit http://www.origins-usa.org/Default.aspx?pageId=24333 to find a volunteer you can call if you need support, or to sign up as a HUGS volunteer and support other mothers.

Friday, July 4, 2008

A Wonderful Alternative to Adoption

Saving girl child, adoption of villages top FLO agenda

Commemorating the silver jubilee of its formation this year, Federation of Indian Chambers of Commerce and Industry Ladies Organisation has set saving the girl child, adoption of villages for empowerment of women, and planting of trees as its top agenda.

SAVING THE girl child, adoption of villages for the empowerment of women, and planting of trees top the agenda of the Federation of Indian Chambers of Commerce and Industry (FICCI) Ladies Organisation (FLO), as the organisation goes into an overdrive to commemorate the silver jubilee of its formation this year.

Addressing the media, Anuradha Goel, president, FLO, said, "The ‘Save the Girl Child’ project, to be launched on July 23 by Renuka Chaudhury, Union minister for women and child development, has been designed to raise the awareness levels in women, children and menfolk in villages and semi-urban areas. The objective is to create awareness of the detrimental effect of the declining sex ratio in various parts of the country."

Goel said, under the project, "we will go to the factories and other household industrial clusters, call in the local Members of Legislative Assembly (MLAs) and women panchayat leaders, and impress upon them the need to create mass awareness of the socially and morally reprehensible practice of female infanticide."

During the year, FLO also proposes to adopt a village and make it a model village. This will encompass entrepreneurship development programmes for women, planting of tress, training of women in converting kitchen waste into bio-gas as a cooking fuel. Such a village, the FLO chief said, would also provide recreational and other facilities to elder citizens. "We will adopt a holistic approach. The idea would be to involve whole families in community care, where women will be joined by children and men in the making of a model village."

Goel said, during its silver jubilee year, FLO would plant 2,500 tress throughout the country. FLO would also impart training in nurturing and care of tree saplings and each tree would be under the charge of a tree-custodian or parent.

In a bid to promote entrepreneurship and professional excellence in women, FLO, as part of its ongoing programme, proposes to organise 25 training programmes across India at the grass root, middle and senior levels. Five of these will be at the grass

Goel said, FLO will take up a programme of mentoring 25 professional FLO members as also continue with showcasing of the talents of FLO members in its seven chapters throughout the country.

She announced that the postal authorities would release a special postage stamp/cover to commemorate the silver jubilee year.

The Press meet was also addressed by FLO past presidents – Abha Dalmia, Dr Manju V Mehta, Kusum Ansal, Mukta Jain, Sudha Jhunjhunwala, and young FLO member, Shalu Jindal.

Wouldn't it be grand to see Ethiopia, Russia, China, Guatemala, Vietnam, and other nations that are having their children taken from them create similar projects?

Projects like this are a great alternative to suggest to those who complain about the high fees involved in adopting on child. One can only guess how much good $40,000 could do to improve the lives of an entire village - build a school? Buy books? Medical supplies?

The US could use funded affordable day care!

This is Family Preservation in practice!





Monday, June 30, 2008

MIGHTY Chondrial/Mighty Eve!

Mitochondrial or mtDNA is the MOTHERLOAD!


In sexually reproducing organisms, mitochondria are normally inherited exclusively from the mother. The fact that mitochondrial DNA is maternally inherited enables researchers to trace maternal lineage far back in time.

Mitochondrial Eve (mt-mrca) is the name given by researchers to the woman who is defined as the matrilineal most recent common ancestor (MRCA) for all currently living humans. Passed down from mother to offspring, her mitochondrial DNA (mtDNA) is now found in all living humans: every mtDNA in every living person is derived from hers. Mitochondrial Eve is the female counterpart of Y-chromosomal Adam, the patrilineal most recent common ancestor, although they lived at different times.

She is believed to have lived about 140,000 years ago in what is now Ethiopia, Kenya or Tanzania. The time she lived is calculated based on the molecular clock technique of correlating elapsed time with observed genetic drift.

Mitochondrial Eve is the most recent common ancestor (MRCA) of all humans via the mitochondrial DNA pathway, not the unqualified MRCA of all humanity. All living humans can trace their ancestry back to the MRCA via at least one of their parents, but Mitochondrial Eve is defined via the maternal line. Therefore, she necessarily lived at least as long, though likely much longer, ago than the MRCA of all humanity.

Mitochondrial Eve is a person who is a common ancestor to all living humans on a female-only ancestral line. The fact that such a person existed is a logical consequence of the two facts: that humans are one species; and that no one has more than one (biological) mother. It should be stressed that “Eve” is an abstraction: as the most recent matrilineal common ancestor of living humans, it is possible for her identity to change, though it would now be necessary to kill off a large proportion of the human race in order to achieve this.




Whatd'ya mean you're working on out genealogy?

Thursday, June 12, 2008

DeJaVu

When I say that I have been involved in helping mothers who lost children to adoption and trying to change adoption since the 1970's...I have often been asked what we did in all that time.

The first and primary cncern of mothers - and adpotees - during those decades of the 70s and 80s was search and support. We searched feverishly for our children and in doing so found and perfected and proteced good "sources" and outed bad ones who scammed people.

One of the five co-founders of origins - started in NJ in 1980 - was Luce Pare who was set up and very lucky not to have wound up in jail. Not so lucky was sandy Musser who did serve time for assisting in searches.

Now once again...we are forced to become criminal to get what should be ours. This woman apparently dared to operate in a state that is still living in the 1950s when it comes to adoption.

Woman accused of stealing records pleads no contest
The Associated Press
Article Last Updated: 06/11/2008 12:57:18 PM MDT

Posted: 12:56 PM- BRIGHAM CITY -- A woman accused of stealing adoption records from a Davis County courthouse pleaded no contest to the charges.
But Jill Ekstrom may have defendant's regret. She tells an Ogden newspaper that she had taken painkillers Monday and may withdraw the plea.
Ekstrom is the former owner of UtahFinders.com. She gained notoriety for reuniting adopted children with their biological parents.
A Davis County prosecutor, Rick Westmoreland, says 300 to 400 adoption case files from the 1970s were contained on several rolls of microfilm. The microfilm has not been recovered.
Ekstrom, 43, was accused of selling some of that information to an undercover officer.
The Standard-Examiner says Ekstrom pleaded no contest to five misdemeanors. Sentencing is set for July 22.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

...ISTS and ISMS..

Current political events have led me to ponder the suffixes -ist and -ism.

Why, I wondered is bad to be a racist, ageist, or sexist -- while not so to be a feminist? Is there such a thing as maleism or maleists? Or just chauvinists and misogynists?

If I were an adoptionist - would that make me for it or against it, I pondered.

So, I looked and found:
The suffix -ism denotes a distinctive system of beliefs, myth, doctrine or theory that guides a social movement, institution, class or group.
The suffix -ist is used to denote a person who either practices something or a person who is concerned with something or a person who holds certain principles, doctrines, etc.

Made sense. If you play the flute, you are a flautist. If you play the piano...a pianist. But those who love dance are not dancists. Hmm.

If you believe in socialism, you are a socialist, but if you believe democracy you are not a democacist or even necessarily a democrat! And if you believe in Christ, you are a Christian, not a Chritsist. Perhps you have to believe an ism to be an ist?

The only conclusion I have come to is that this election is hurting my brain with its "ists" and "isms." It seems to be creating far more divisiveness about our DIFFERENCES, than uniting us...and the lines of difference get finer and finer by the day.

At what age is someone "too old" to run for office? It's like trying to figure out who is "too fat" or "too thin" these days - especially hard if you are in show biz. I think there is one and one ideal weight and anyone a few pounds over that limit - like Kirsty Allen - is labeled "fat" or worse, yet fall a pound or two below the exact acceptable weight and you're suspected of being anorexic (though not an anorexist)!

I think it all has one name with no ism or ist. I think it's all called discrimination!

Thursday, June 5, 2008

Capitis diminutio minima and DNA

According to Hebrew and Roman law the offspring of incest or adultery could not be legitimated. Loss of status (capitis diminutio, media or maxima), involved loss of liberty or citizenship, and destroyed the paternal power. Emancipation and adoption had a similar effect. Adoption, which tries to emulate nature, was a means of acquiring the (proper) paternal power.

Our current adoption laws maintain capitis diminutio minima, which involves loss of (original, non-legitimized) family relations in order to acquire the desired status or power of the legally replaced relationship.

Conversely, Part 12 of a 13 part series of YouTube videos entitled Esoteric Agenda talks about Goddesses and patriarchy, innate knowledge and the link between EMOTIONS and DNA.

The very fascinating part for me was the PHANTOM DNA experiment with photons maintaining the DNA form even after it's physically removed. I found that very significant in terms of our relationship to our chidlren - even when we are not with them.

I have always loved reading the fascinating stories of twins separated at birth because of the amazingly similarities in things we would never suspect as being genetic, such as career choices. Of course, now knowing that some of these studies were done by involuntary means is extremely disturbing to say the least...reminiscent of Nazi Germany....and done knowingly by a NYC Jewish adoption agency: Louise Wise, makes it all the more repugnant.

That aside - our DNA runs through our children and forms a great deal of who they are, despite nurture and despite laws that make them capitis diminutio minima.

RussiaToday Apr 29, 2010 on Russian Adoption Freeze

Russi Today: America television Interview 4/16/10 Regarding the Return of Artyem, 7, to Russia alone

RT: Russia-America TV Interview 3/10

Korean Birthmothers Protest to End Adoption

Motherhood, Adoption, Surrender, & Loss

Who Am I?

Bitter Winds

Adoption and Truth Video

Adoption Truth

Birthparents Never Forget