Sometimes I wonder why Family Preservation is so simple and yet so hard to cultivate in American culture. I wonder why the myths of adoption are so readily accepted and believed by the masses and why there is such resistance to accepting the truth.
I am reminded of what a publisher at Simon and Schuster said in 1987 after reading my first book, "shedding light on..The Dark Side of Adoption." After saying how well researched and well written the book was, he then said, "but....
"...the public will not buy a book with a negative point of view about adoption. Those who adopt do so of necessity, not choice, and though they suspect abuses in the system, they are inclined to overlook the problems because they have no alternative. Seeing the subject realistically might be too painful and unacceptable."
THE ONLY PEOPLE MAD AT YOU
FOR SPEAKING THE TRUTH
ARE THOSE LIVING A LIE.
Ah, yes indeed! As Harry Truman said: "I never gave them hell. I just told the truth and they thought it was hell."
If the purpose of adoption were to please those who "needed" to adopt, then my friend at Simon & Schuster would be correct. But what if adoption were really about putting the needs of children first and doing what is in their best interest, not allowing them to be commodified into gifts we hand out - or sell - to those eager for them? Would we not remove the blinders and listen and hear the TRUTH, no matter how ugly and painful?
How can we knowingly ignore the truths of corruption, coercion, exploitation, kidnapping, child trafficking and denial of the rights of adopted people... and hail adoption as a "good"?
What about those of us for whom it is NOT a "necessity"? Stand up and speak out! Speak, even if you voice shakes. And never stop until the insanity stops.